Okayest Summer Ever

End of year projects and tests are happening. Report cards are coming home soon. Teacher gifts will be delivered, graduations will be recognized, and your news feed will be filled with suggestions on how to craft the best end-of-year gift (monogrammed apple key chains! Thanks a “latte” starbucks gift card holders!) and how to make the most of summer. Make your own kite! Movies under the stars with a sheet and a projector and lawn chairs! Sidewalk chalk bombs and silly string welcoming the kids home on the last day of school! This is a true story: my brother and sister in law just posted a last day of school picture of their son. He is headed off to college in the fall, and in the pic he is s

End of Year Gifts

Sitting in the waiting room of a doctor appointment this week, and one of the lovely clinicians offers me a cup of coffee. I shouldn’t really, she says. It’s not for clients. But, it’s so early. Do you … No thanks, I say. I’m already over caffeinated and it’s only 8:30 am. We start to chat. She really needs the coffee after the morning she’s had, she tells me. Long story short: a disappointed kid, which makes for a guilt-ridden working mom. I promised her that not chaperoning her daughter’s field trip was an act of charity. It gave the judgy moms someone to judge, which we all know is code for helping an insecure person feel better about themselves. Her guilt was really a gift for other mom

Bye, Regina

There are a few Regina Georges running around - and it always seems like spring brings out the worst of it. These kids have been in class / clubs / bus / sports / scouts together since September - not by their choosing, just by the dumb luck of being thrown into the situation - and they have had enough. They didn’t choose these kids to be in their constant sphere, but there they are. And I know, I know, we can’t always choose our colleagues / neighbors / committee members and they have to learn to deal with adversity and But kids haven’t formed the thick skins yet. Everything feels hard and personal and sad and when kids are mean - and kids are mean! - it feels harder. The reaso

There is No End Game (Spoiler Alert)

Get ready for some serious end game spoilers, since there are about 20 minutes left in the school year and that is just enough time for a few major calamities. First, brown bag lunches. There are 42 field trips between now and the end of May and you are going to have to send in a brown bag lunch to at least a few of them. No glass bottles, no reusable water bottles that you need her to bring home at the end. 100% disposable. The green new deal has exemptions for elementary school field trip lunches. Stock up on juice pouches. You may be hitting Wawa on the way to the 7:30 am drop off otherwise. Next, volunteers. The teachers are ALL.DONE so they are going to be emailing out for volunteers fo

Decisions are made by those who show up

Here’s the dirty secret of mom-ing that no one tells you. It’s not a TED talk or a PTA agenda item. No one at a support group tells you this and it’s not a hot topic at play dates- becoming a mom means becoming an advocate. We advocate all the time for our kids. We do it with our families, their schools, other parents, sometimes even other kids. Consider the conferences, conversations, or coffees when you’ve been a defender or champion of your kids’ behavior or attitude. We also teach. Think of those quiet conversations with her reminding her how strong she is, or those snuggles with him telling him that he is ready for the coming day. We teach them how to navigate the world and, in doing th

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