Let’s be clear. I believe Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, Valentine’s Day and the like are all Hallmark Holidays. Do I think it’s nice to recognize people for their contributions to our family and our general livelihood and happiness? Yes, of course. Do I think we should do it because there is a day on the calendar labeled "Father’s Day” and because there is a sale on tires and neckties? Nope. These are holidays encouraged by retailers to sell greeting cards etc. and fortunately, both my family of origin and the family I married into are not super big into these things. A small gesture is appreciated but we don’t make a big deal out of these things.
That’s one of the many things I’m grateful for about my life partner / spouse / husband. He doesn’t make a big deal out of these things or really that many things. He famously rolls with it. He shows up at the pool with the things we forgot, he picks up takeout when no dinner has magically materialized, he works and pays the bills and mows the lawn and he does so with little or no fanfare or the exhaustive sighs that accompany nearly every single thing I do. Now, in fairness, his roles involve a lot of visible physical labor (like, he does things with wheelbarrows and has specific tools for specific yard-related jobs) and not a lot of emotional labor (I spent over an hour in Target today getting the children to pick out Father’s Day cards for my father, two graduation cards, and a birthday card. I was so exhausted after this that we immediately left Target and did not even go get the birthday gift I kept telling myself to go look for. I mean, seriously. EX.HAUSTING.)
I digress. This man tolerates with grace and dignity the regular over-committing I do, leaving him to manage solo while I’m going to some board meeting or other. He just rolls with it. I’m so grateful, because at least one of us in this house needs to maintain some sense of calm and with three middle schoolers and their lunatic overextended mom, he’s pretty much it.
Plus he’s cute.
Happy Father’s Day to him, and to all the dads. Sorry about the cards.