Normal 2.0

Aside from really REALLY missing restaurants — I know, I know, I could go. But the thought of the server flitting from my table to that table to that table back to me to the kitchen me again over there and now back makes me think it wouldn’t be the best idea, and so I have only been out once — but aside from that, my life is kind of back to normal this summer. A new normal. Normal 2.0. We do what we love to do the most - hang out with a friend or two on the screened porch at home, hang out with family and friends in the bubble at the beach, and go to the pool to hang with that same group of friends. Our OBX vacation was blissful - we arrived having been pretty locked down for a week, as all the other families were, and we enjoyed a simple week of music and laughter and each other. It’s a reflection certainly on how unsocial my social life is, and how fulfilling. I’m grateful on the regular that I live the life I live, even as I cried my way through the drive thru at the bank last week after a fighting with a teenager about their social life. Spoiler alert: I’m ruining everything. I’m the worst. I don’t care at all.

This quote from Queen Glennon this week really spoke to me: “If I say no to someone and they get angry, it does not mean I should have said yes.”

Guys, this is HARD. Summer may have felt easy in a lot of ways, but it’s still hard. It’s hard for us with our mature rational experienced brains and it’s super super hard for our littles who want what they want when they want it, and don’t really understand about cause and effect and how far the consequences to actions really can go. We have to keep saying no, and meaning it. We have to keep enforcing the limits. A therapist I know said it’s their job to push the limits, and it’s our job to save them from themselves. We are their lifeguards, and their safe harbors all at once.

Spoiler alert: it’s about to get even harder.

School reopening plans are already circulating and the tensions are running high. Teachers, administrators, parents, students are all wavering between terrified and exhausted and every decision feels actually like life or death. I do not envy the decision-makers, and I will not badmouth them - this is nothing like what they signed up for and they are, as we’ve said before, building the plane while they are flying it. We all are. There will be threads in the FB groups and text messages will be flying as the info shakes out. We will all need a collective deep breath and a long walk in the woods to process it all. But of this we can be certain: the sun rises each day and sets each day. It’s August now and the days are getting shorter. It’s been 142 days since March 13, and it’s 145 days until Christmas - a lifetime, and a blink.

This is also certain: we’ve got this, just as we’ve handled every other thing that’s come our way - one day at a time, with our wingmoms.

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