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The Real Controversy

With all the school board meetings and mask mandates being hot topics of discussion this week, let’s reflect for a moment on the elephant in the room - the real controversy on everyone’s mind, the thing that divides us into solid camps of Pro or Con. And when all this passes - and it will, oh it will, as history has oft illustrated, what then?

Here’s the thing: some of us just can’t pull off a middle part. But we don’t want to look totally dated or cringey, which is apparently a thing that describes me according to my middle schoolers. What’s a widows-peaked mom in her 40s to do? I have flat-ironed for days. I have used the beach waver, I have followed YouTube tutorials, I have velcro-rolled. But I spent decades - DECADES - with a side part and I look at myself with a center part and ALL I CAN SEE is Ali MacGraw in Love Story and it’s just not working for me. But "love means never having to say you’re sorry,” right? and so I’m not saying I’m sorry for this.

When I see you at Back to School Night or at Walgreens with my 90s-Forever side part, now decorated with the reading glasses that are always parked on top of my head, even when another pair of glasses (sun or reading) are on my face, please just respect my privacy during this difficult time.

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